Dairy of a Mad dru continued….

THE NEXT TWO WEEKS  

Now I’ve past through week four and I’m into week five

And again it’s been explained that I just don’t qualify

I’ve been to several consolers and they keep asking me my goal

And I just keep saying; “Hell just help me

because I don’t really know”

So each writes up one more contract designed to crush my soul

And I go back home and ponder

Which way should I now go?

They only seem to see a fat old lady and hystericalist…So they say I need more meds though I can’t afford a therapist

Then again they explain that I don’t deserve what they first mentioned when I was going home from what seemed like the detention

Yet everyone keeps asking me what is my intention

So then I almost feel like dancing again

just to get their attention

***********************************************

BILLS

Spilt Milk

So far I’ve called on two bills from the ambulance and a shrink but even with one discount just those costs will make me sink

The shrink gave me a discount ‘cause I have to pay with cash

But the other gave me grief and so that bill goes into the trash

i  went to my PO Box and tried to face my mail

And like i anticipated the stuff made me go very pale

…sigh…

 There is another bill for eleven thousand from this last little foray

And a lien on my  sweet home from a taxing authority

Sigh…..   Well all this pissing and moaning makes me look like a jerk, so I guess I’ll stop this now and get ready for work… sigh….

dru dresses like a clown

DIARY of a MAD dru

The First Three Weeks

Early Hours:

 I’m climbing back from a hole that was black

But I’m not exactly sure what I think about that

Inside & Outside:

 I tell them all what they all want to hear

But I’m not really sure that I make myself clear

Setbacks:

 To fix my soul, each day I plan – one tiny little goal

But then it seems each day I fix just what I can’t control

The System:

They told me all that I must do

They gave me meds so I won’t be blue

But when I try to carry through

They say “Oh no we are not for you”

                    *****

 Poor Eliza’s dear old Alfred P

Was in some ways exactly like me

Yet he was happy, he did not want more,

So unlike him I do deplore

That I am part of the undeserving poor

         

        Meds and Moods:

          The meds I’m on, they make me woozy

          But at least for now I’m not a boozey

                              *****

          My BP is low and then it is HIGH

          First I’m in a hole than I’m in the sky

                              *****

          My moods they shift from high to low

          Sometimes I talk fast and then I talk slow

 

TEARS:

 I cry because a stupid cat

Just brought in a big dead rat

 *****

Yes I do believe that money can talk

It says “Without me life is dust and chalk”

  *****

I pace around when on the phone I talk

And when it RINGS I cry and balk

I don’t like people, I can’t tolerate crowds

And I’m most upset at anything loud

  *****

I feel sometimes I just can’t cope

And at those times I misplace hope

But then I think “No don’t wallow, don’t misbehave

It is just that you have become afraid

So rejoice that you still have your work

Even if you’re just a lowly clerk”

  *****

I’m so ashamed when I shake and cry

And sometimes I really don’t even know why

Yet other times I can explain

But even then it causes pain

 APOLOGIES:

 When I stop leaking from my eyes

I’m going to have to apologize

It really hard but I must explain

Exactly why I did not refrain

It wasn’t just that I’m mad through and through

It’s just it seemed the right thing to do

I really know you all were there

It is just that I didn’t seem to care